Comments on: Violent Youth

By: Carin LeRoy

Carin LeRoy — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 17:21:44 +0000

I agree with the comments above as things that contribute to the decline in the values of our children. One thing I think of, too, though is what some may call an old-fashioned term. I believe our children are not taught to “fear” God. Because God has been taken away in our schools and culture, kids do not see that they are accountable to anyone, anything, and especially not God.
I was raised with a healthy fear of God and taught that I would be accountable for every action I did on earth. And that one day I would stand before Him and “give an account.” Today, I do not believe our children have a healthy fear of God.
I was also taught that I was also very loved and valued by God, and He had a special purpose for my life. I not only “feared God”, but I also knew His love for me was everlasting. I knew my life had purpose and meaning. Sometimes I believe that our kids are floundering because they wonder what life is all about. They have no purpose and direction, and sadly, no knowledge of God.
I also think we need some of those old-fashioned values back - like simple living, moms at home more, church on Sunday, and a strong community of friends and family. Many of these are also missing.
We desperately need to bring God back into the culture. We are losing too many of our children.

By: Dotsie

Dotsie — Fri, 23 May 2008 11:01:40 +0000

Theresa, your post gets back to the hurried pace we live. Time is valuable, and time sent with our youth is essential. You are so right!

By: Theresa

Theresa — Fri, 23 May 2008 03:41:08 +0000

Lack of QUALITY and QUANTITY of time is top on my list. Kids need to interact with both parents and really get to know who they are… from both sides of the relationship. Kids need to see/experience their parents’ faith as something REAL and not just a Sunday social time.

Second, I would have to say shows (that I love) like CSI and Criminal Minds are a bad influence on developing minds. My children are grown, but I think these kinds of shows sensationalize and glamorize sick, sinful, unacceptable behavior. Not to mention, all the Xbox games, etc. that seem to deaden their senses to the reality of death.

Satan is very suttle. He doesn’t have to work so hard, if we allow him to have more time influencing our children than we choose to have.

I pray for my kids daily - that God watches over them and guides their paths to be in line with his will for their lives. Who better to watch over them than the creator?

By: Dotsie

Dotsie — Wed, 21 May 2008 14:38:08 +0000

Your last sentence resonates with me. It’s right on! THanks for your response.

By: Karla Akins

Karla Akins — Wed, 21 May 2008 14:25:07 +0000

The devil hates our children and he wants them. We are in a spiritual war for the minds and hearts of our children. We have to remember, God was a perfect Father in the garden (He is STILL a perfect Father!) and His children chose to disobey.

I am mystified myself at how good parents can have kids that make bad choices. But the truth is, we are all human, and we are not perfect. If God, Who is perfect, has children who disobey, then we need to realize that if our kids make right choices, it is by the grace of God, and not by our own doing.

By: Dotsie

Dotsie — Wed, 21 May 2008 13:47:10 +0000

Allison, thanks for the thought provoking response. I am well aware of parents living in a dream world about their children. In this day and age, you’d think getting psychiatric help was acceptable. I don’t find that’s always the case.

By: Dotsie

Dotsie — Wed, 21 May 2008 13:44:49 +0000

Julie, I totally agree. Our pace is too fast for the children.

By: Allison

Allison — Tue, 20 May 2008 13:53:56 +0000

Many of you know my newest book is, Setting Boundaries with Your Adult Children, Six Steps to Hope and Healing for Struggling Parents. I specifically included a chapter in the book titled, “But Deep Down He’s Really a Good Kid.” This chapter looks at the issue of what psychologists now call, “Antisocial Personality Disorder.” In years past, the term was “Sociopathic Personality.”

I agree with Suze, it would be wonderful if a straightforward answer were possible. Alas, there are just too many variables to this complex issue. Yet in all of my research on why some of our children become violent, I began to see a common denominator…parents who were unable or unwilling, to recognize and admit that who and what their children used to be is not what they are now. Many times, a gap in reality and expectation started very early in the parenting dynamic. Many of our children are emotionally, intellectually, psychologically, socially, and spiritually stunted. However, many parents are unable or unwilling to see that. I must echo what Tracy said, there is also a key component at work when it comes to a Christian parent—we must acknowledge the reality and powerful influence of evil. As Christians, we must understand Satan’s ability to corrupt and destroy a human life. We must also understand though the devil may seem to be winning, the battle is still the Lord’s.

By: --julie

--julie — Tue, 20 May 2008 03:42:18 +0000

I don’t know if this is the answer, but I think it touches on it anyway…It seems in our culture we are busy, busy, busy, doing, running, providing, stuff, stuff, stuff, and we don’t just connect with our children. We don’t take the time to just be…be together, be a family, eat a meal unhurried, have a complete conversation….Over time, that has to cost something, doesn’t it?

By: Dotsie

Dotsie — Mon, 19 May 2008 20:26:57 +0000

Suz, I totally agree that it begins with us. We have somehow robbed them - of exactly what, I’m not sure, but I think it alls boils down to feeling loved! People who love and feel loved don’t do these things.

I also think people avoid kids who are different (even though these two kids did not appear to be different). This is wrong. Kids who appear different need just as much love and attention as others.