I have just returned from a speaking engagement in Rutherford County, North Carolina.

It’s not an overly populated place, but those who live there are warm and loving, fun and hospitable. They are Southern Hospitality walking on legs, if you want the truth of it.

It’s not an overly populated place, like I said, but last year two of their women were murdered in front of their children. And by the father’s of their children.

Rutherford County, North Carolina has an organization called Family Resources. Let me “read” to you from their information: Family Resources is a private, non-profit United Way Agency originally incorporated in 1982 under the name PATH (Prevention of Abuse in the Home) for the purpose of prviding services for victims of domestic violence in our area. With support from the community, we have expanded services consistently since 1984…

Expansion equals a need to expand.

That means more women and children are being abused, typically by the male head of the household.

Before I get into the event I attended called “Power of the Purse” (the name alone intrigued me!) I want to share some stats. Please, I beg you, take notice of these:

According to NOW (National Organization of Women) although only 572,000 reports of assault by intimates are officially reported to federal officials each year, the most conservative estimates indicate two to four million women of all races and classes are battered each year. At least 170,000 of those violent incidents are serious enough to require hospitalization, emergency room care or a doctor’s attention.

It gets worse.

Every day four women die in this country as a result of domestic violence. The number of women who have been murdered by their intimate partners is greater than the number of soldiers killed in the Vietnam War.

Even more horrifying is the national report on child abuse. In 2006 3.6 million children received an investigation by CPS (Child Protective Services) agencies the year before. 25% of those were determined to have been abused. That’s 900,000 children if my math skills are as sharp as they should be.

In Matthew 18:10, Jesus’ words are recorded thusly: “See that you do not look down on one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven.

In the year preceding that report, 1530 children died as a result of neglect and abuse. That’s 1530 children MORE than should have died. 51.9% were at the hands of women. 42.1% were at the hands of men. 80% of that total were the parents of the children. Not grandparents. Not stepparents. Parents. Flesh and blood parents.

64% of the 905,000 were neglected.

What does that mean, you might ask. Were they not bought a favorite toy…allowed to stay up past 9:00pm?

No. These children were left alone, not fed, not bathed, not clothed properly, not sent to school, not loved.

Not touched.

I am crying just thinking about it.

So, what does Power of the Purse do? Power of the Purse is an event held in Rutherfordton County to raise money for Family Resources. We enter the fellowship hall of the local Baptist church. We pay a small fee, we are given a number. Mine was 61.

Then we move to the perimeter of the room. Purses of every shape, design, etc. are displayed on tables.

Each purse has a piece of paper on it and a starting bid. The first to catch my eye was an adorable black cocktail purse with a starting bid of $12 and a price tag still attached of $148. I know a deal when I see it. I bid. Going on around the room, taking light refreshments, making more bids, I then came to the center of the room where the ladies in attendance (about 200, if I had to guess) were gathering, chatting, waiting for the main course.

The woman in charge called the bidding to stop and everyone to the seats.

After a brief introduction, she noted I was in the room. This came as a surprise because this is not why I was in Rutherfordton. My day of speaking was to be the following day. But I was asked if I’d like to say anything and I said I would. You see, I was an abused wife in my first marriage. I know what this feels like. I have rescued an abused and neglected child. I’ve seen it all, as the saying goes.

And so I spoke for about five minutes. Left eyes a little damp. Prayed no one would outbid me on the black cocktail purse. Perspective.

We were served dinner. We ate. We laughed. We talked. We had five minutes more for bidding. The bidding was closed. “Ladies get your purses.” I left with my adorable black bag. Happy, happy.

Sad, sad.

Our efforts were enjoyable but were for a very REAL cause. And though it is something to do, it is not enough.

So I make a vow. I will not see another abuse or neglect that God has placed in my path and pass it off as someone else’s responsibility. I will mentor young women as God has directed so they can become better mother’s…so they can know they don’t have to live “like this” anymore. I will contact my local shelters and child abuse centers and ask, “What can I do?” and, more than that, I will do it.

What about you. Isn’t it time to stop this nonsense? And buy our purses at department stores?

No matter how much fun The Power of the Purse was…I won’t forget the tears behind the laughter. I won’t forget I can stop the violence.

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