Maybe it’s the fact that all three young adult children are home. Maybe it’s because it’s summer and I want to play more and work less. Maybe it’s that I’m a boomer woman and experiencing peri-menopausal symptoms. Maybe it’s a bit of all the above. Who really knows?
Lately, I’m seeking peace. I want deep down, honest to goodness, peace in my heart. I want the kind that can only come from the love of Jesus.
Early morning, while sitting on the patio, surrounded by my Bible, journal, study, and prayer folder – petunia aroma, chirping birds, buzzing locusts, sun to my left, tall pines to my right, dog at my feet, I feel it seep in from the top of my midlife highlighted head to the bottom of my pink pedicured summer toes. The peace settles in and resides completely.
Then I close my God centered items, place them back in the basket at the kitchen table, head off to throw in laundry, water a few plants, straighten from the hours of young adult livelihood lived while hubby and I slept, and then get to work. There are calls to make, emails to answer, forums in which to post, bills to be paid, writing to do, contest entries to be read, and the list goes.
A couple hours later, I’m searching… The house phone rings, work phone, cell phone – all ring – friends come to call, the kids are coming and going, the dryer buzzes, dog barks, mailman arrives – the demands are piling up. Life’s in full swing.
I’ve lost that peaceful feeling. Sometimes - by God’s grace, I hear that still small voice and I’m called back to peace.
Other times – I’m so wrapped up, so charged, full steam ahead, lots of energy, onward, and I lose it totally…
until I awaken the next day, check in with God, and begin again.
I’m grateful He’s willing to greet me each morning, forgive me for losing Him, and allow me to begin again.
Does this sound familiar?
For God is not a God of confusion, but a God of peace. -1 Corinthians 14:33
12 Comments
Thank you, Dotsie. I needed this today.
Suz, glad it spoke to you. I was so searching for peace one day last week, and I opened my study and quess what it was about? Yup, peace. Funny how that works. MAy you feel it from your head to your toes!
Dotsie,
I’ve recently began spending time in the morning reading the Word and then in the evenings after dark heading out to the patio to sit and listen — finding my peace.
I went to a Christmas program a couple of years ago in Redlands, CA. There was a part of it that center around peace — not just finding the Prince of Peace, but guarding your peace.
When I find myself not at peace, it’s usually because I’ve failed to guard my peace and let other things or people’s opinions creep inside in it’s place.
Thanks for the reminder. Makes me look even more to this evening’s session on the patio!
Karen, I love your reference to “guarding your peace.” I’m going to remember that. It definitely takes work, but it’s so worth it in the end. It reminds me of a saying I learned years ago. Don’t let anything or anyone “rob you of your joy.”
Thanks for sharing.
Dotsie, This heart message could not have come at a more appropriate time in my life. Thank you, Dotsie, for always sharing so transparently (not to mention, elloquently.) You have inspired so many of us the past 18 months. Hard to believe our BOOMER BABES ROCK team has been together that long. I’ve learned so much from you amazing ladies. Thank you, Dotsie, for this heartfeltt message. It has blessed me greatly, just like the writer! xoxo - Allison
I wrote something recently about grace (Grace personified) that so parallels your last few lines. Just the realization that grace is always there for us, whether or not we choose to recognize it and live there. For me, that’s when peace comes.
Allison, you are more than welcome. It’s my absolute pleasure. This blog keeps me writing about my faith in a way that’s different from my journaling. I love it. So thank you.
dianne, if we could only hould that thought forever…
Dotsie, you nailed it. This time of life seems to be a bit unsettling, but God will fill us with His peace when we seek it.
“You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you.”
Isaiah 26:3
Jan, I believe it’s any time in life, regardless of the stage. I thought things would calm down when I was in my empty nest, but I still managed to go at a pace, ignoring God’s grace until I chose to tap in again in the morning.
Love the Isaih passage. Thanks for sharing.
Dotsie,
I enjoy your writing very much. Most weeks it hits me where I am at. Do you blog anywhere else? I will miss your weekly notes.
Karin
Karin, thanks for your words.
You are welcome to join me in the forum community at http://www.boomerwomenspeak.com where I post in my fourms almost every single day of the year. While it’s not called a blog, it works in a similar manner. I’d love to *see* you there. Onward.