So Mother’s Day is this weekend. If you are a mom, or have a mom, or know someone who is a mom, you’ll hopefully acknowledge the day somehow.  (This is me with my mom, grandma and daughter, a shot taken 14 years ago!)

            For some, Mother’s Day is a tough day, as Ali’s post the other day pointed out. For some, Mother’s Day painfully points out losses–of children, or moms, or just healthy relationships.

            I’m a mom of two great kids. I can’t believe how lucky I am to have such terrific children. I would love to take credit. But I didn’t raise them by myself.

            Of course, there’s my husband, who helped out a lot (although there were seasons where he seemed to be working so much that I felt like a single parent). But he was not my only partner in parenting.

    Even if you are a single parent, (perhaps especially if you are), you rely on others to help you. Or at least, you should. In fact, I think kids are better off if they have a network of people who support and encourage them, from coaches to parents to teachers to friends. Good moms realize we can’t do this ourselves, that it takes more than just a mom to raise a child. I know a lot of moms who think they ought to be enough for their child. They are making themselves crazy, trying to do it all.

            As a working mom who travels, I depend on other women to take care of my kids when I can’t do it. And I think my kids are better for it.

            It’s not an admission of failure to ask for help. And it’s not slighting your kids to receive that help.

            Last Saturday, I was on my way home from an out of town speaking gig. I had to work Friday and Saturday. My kids were at home with my hubby Friday, but then Saturday morning, hubby and daughter took off for a soccer tournament. My son went to spend the day with Sue and Adam, who are like godparents to our kids (we’re not Catholic so they’re what one friend of mine labels “other significant adults” to our children). They went out to breakfast, went to a movie, hung out.            

            I called Sue from the road at about 5 p.m., thanking her for keeping Aaron for the day, telling her I could come over to get him soon. “Well, we don’t want to give him back yet,” she said lightly. “We’re going to the neighbor’s for dinner. Can we bring him home later?”

(Adam and Sue, me and Scot)

          She went on to say how much they’d enjoyed spending the day with my son, and what a great kid he is. I agreed, and pointed out, “Sue, if he’s a good kid, that’s partially your fault. You’ve been a significant part of his life since he was born. You’ve helped me raise him, you and Adam have been a positive influence on him.”

            We decided to hang up so neither of us would cry. But it’s true. I owe a lot to Adam and Sue, who don’t have kids of their own but help to parent not only their nieces and nephew, but my kids as well. Sue’s great advice, based on her experience as a pre-school teacher, helped me get through my kids’ early years. Both of them will take my kids for one-on-one time, whether it is to the mall or a model airplane show. They’ve stayed with the kids when I’m out of town, doing everything from driving carpools to walking the dog. The ministry I do could not happen without them.

            My friend Jo is another mom who, despite the fact that she has five children, is always willing to have my kids over to her house. She’s been like a mom to them through the years. We’ve also compared notes on parenting, encouraged each other, laughed together at the crazy things our families do. Again, she’s someone who I want to say thank you to this Mother’s Day.

            Who has helped you to parent your kids? Or, who helped parent you as a child? This Mother’s Day, be sure to acknowledge the “other mothers” in your life.

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